Primary Program

Okay, so I thought I posted this Sunday night...
Today is our ward primary program and until I have grandchildren, this will be the last one in which I am craning my neck to see the face of one of 'our kids'. Because Millie just left primary two weeks ago they asked her to give a talk as part of the program. You know, one of the little five line talks they have a few of the kids do during the program. After the program Keen came over to tell me that he always loves the primary programs, but this was the first time he ever felt during one of those little talks the way he does when he hears an adult speaker give a particularly spiritual talk. Way to go Milfred! Anyhow, I got to thinking about the whole, this is our last primary program thing, and this fact makes me feel older than any birthday I have ever had. Isn't that funny! My mom always calls on my birthdays and asks on those big ones, thirty, forty..."Do you feel old?". I never really have felt old on either of those days, you know, too busy to even consider it. But I remember when I turned thirty my mom told me that my turning thirty really made her feel old. I guess that is how it is for me. My being forty doesn't make me old, but having four kids that are all youth sure does.
Doug and I laughed while we were on our trip up to St George about how nice it was to be away for a few days. As we talked about the luxuries of being alone together we came around to the fact that in just 6 years we will be alone for the long haul. Really! Because of our blended 'status' our four kids are too close in age to really be possible, with out twins in there. Anyhow, right now we have 4 kids between 12 years and 15 years of age. The two youngest in grade seven. Yup, you do the math and that means in 6 years (crossed fingers, crossed fingers), we will have one just home from a mission and three others at school. That means 4 kids at the in college at one time. Gulp. NOW do you know why I am such a freak about the grades our kids get. When Doug and I were first married I realized we need college scholarships or Doug and I will be on the streets! And thank goodness I am now a big 'Go to the Y' mom. Because a few years back I was a Boston College girl all the way. That is the difference between a 4 grand a year and forty grand a year. Anyhow, college still seems a long way away for my kids, even though I know for Joey it is right around the bend. Our Bishop spoke to us today at the end of the primary program about raising our kids and giving it all we have! I think Doug and I are doing our best. There is always room for improvement though and I am resolved to do a little better each day. I know some people see Doug and I as crazy. We skip things like The Phantom of the Opera to watch Bret play pee wee basketball. Or Doug will drive all night to ensure he can get the kids to an event at home. Or getting out of bed to make breakfast and lunches for four kids who are perfectly capable of pouring a bowl of cereal, and praying with each of them before they head out the door each day. Or getting up at 4am, driving to Utah for an event and turning around to get back for a game by 4pm. This may seem foolish to some, but to Doug and me, it is parenthood.You know, what we signed up for when we had the little munchkins. Parenting doesn't happen conveniently. We have such limited time with our young ones and the rest of our lives to do things for ourselves.It is not that Doug and I don't steal away for date night or to get out and do some things together. We do. And when the kids leave I am going to miss them more than you could ever know, but in 6 years you can expect to find Doug and me...sleeping in, vacationing places without kid friendly activities, eating dinner late, seeing movies we actually like, watching TV without parent lock on (okay, maybe we will never take that off), taking day trips of our choosing,listening to REAL music, decorating the house with furniture that grownups can appreciate and maybe even having something NICE, staying over night instead of rushing home to be back for the next event...and the list goes on and on!